User Manual

Anger Is Your Friend

Assertion, the driving force of your life, is generated in your liver system. But any time your plans or dreams are thwarted, anger is the raw emotion your liver generates. Anger is divinely inspired, vigorous, and forceful. It’s like a wild horse running across the prairie, racing the wind, making you feel like you are all that. It needs to burst out. It is intimate and does not need to be unkind. After all, love is its inspiration.

Most people misuse their anger by projecting angry thoughts onto others, or their selves. Or they let their brain protest the lessons coming at them out of fear that someone or something outside themselves is controlling their fate or holding them back.

Truth is, our own spirit and soul create our lessons. So, just say “yes” to life’s lessons. Life is so much more exciting and fulfilling that way.

Thinking about anger causes it to rapidly build up in our bodymind until our countenance takes on a tainted appearance. When we hear about anger, horror stories come up about when angry thinking built up so much hatred and other vengeful thoughts that it turned violent. The news media capitalizes on sensationalism, providing horror stories every morning and evening about anger gone awry. As a result, society has demonized this childlike force and made it into something “mean.”

Feeling anger releases it. When we ignore anger or repress it, it keeps building up until it degrades into depression or irrationality. Depression or repressing our actions can become so entrenched that it seems like part of our personality. The more we can feel/experience all our feelings, especially anger, the more we dissipate depression and irrationality. When a person is depressed, anger is actually an upgrade. It’s much higher on the scale of emotions.

Anger is a wonderful, powerful tool in our consciousness. It’s the catalyst that breaks us out of deep old ruts, helping us overcome stifling inertia. When we get stuck in old patterns of grief, confusion, depression or other emotions that hold us back, anger can grab hold of us, shove us out of our rut and into actions that get us back on track.

We need to honor our anger, appreciate it for what it is. It is a vital ingredient of any intimate relationship. When we start to stray from the profound truth and love in our relationships, anger provides the impetus to push us back on track. When we get stuck in a rut of defensiveness or indecision, it’s anger that lights a fire under our rear-end to shove us back into action.

In a healthy state, anger’s mantra would be something like, “Either lead, follow, or get out of the way.” The more we ignore anger, the more pressure it builds up, which can be quite distressing. Anger is a kind of divine discontent that continues to build until we figure out what we want and commit to it. Anger is the honest healthy emotion of our liver. Anger is our friend.

Transforming Anger, using “The Slow Turn”
Often, we can’t get out of our funk until we get righteously angry. Then we storm around channeling all that anger into getting things done that we had previously stalled on.

Any time we become aware of anger, irritation or frustration building up, it’s usually because the direction our spirit wants to go appears blocked. Then it’s time to do the slow turn:

  1. Slowly turn around the circle of your life looking for what you don’t want to keep putting up with in the same old way anymore.
  2. When you find it, ask yourself, “If I don’t want to keep putting up with this, what do I want?” This is the most difficult part of the equation
  3. Once you decide: Commit to it with the kind of decisiveness that you believe the sun’s coming up tomorrow. Commitment is a powerful transformative tool. Nothing happens until you commit.


The instant we commit, all the built-up pressure in the meridians return to normal in a fraction of a second. Then all the heat of inflammation and swelling in the liver starts dissipating similarly to releasing the valve on a hydraulic jack. Within twenty to thirty seconds, the pressure is completely gone.

This process happens because our bodymind, and energy itself, is almost exclusively consciousness. Check it out for yourself. It always seems like a miracle, but I watch it happen every day at my office.

The anger transforms into heartfelt emotions like thankfulness or certainty that what we commit to is happening. Then our liver starts up-taking all the energy we will need to accomplish anything we have committed to.

“The slow turn” transforms anger into a powerful force. Then, if you single-mindedly focus on what you want to do, that makes you unstoppable. The process of successfully manifesting your heart’s desires is a large part of developing your willpower.

Lean into Life’s Difficulties
I love downhill skiing. It is such a great metaphor for life. When you ski, your skis only work for you when you lean forward into your ski boots. In other words, you must lean into the difficulty. In life, that means committing. Only then does the liver uptake enough energy to accomplish that goal or dream.

When the slope is steep—or life is hard—saying “yes” to the difficulties, feeling all the feelings, and committing to your path is like having the hottest new ski equipment. They make it easier for us to get through difficult terrain gracefully.

When we hold back, it’s like trying to skid to a slower speed while skiing through rough terrain. That makes everything harder. Skis are not designed for holding back. Neither is our liver. Like, skiing, life only works well when we lean into the difficulties of the terrain ahead.

We all suffer from socialization. There are hundreds of thousands of subtle ways that society has conditioned us to hold our greatness, to not stand out, to be safe, to give our power away. For example, researchers studying family dynamics observe that the typical parent says “no” to their children in about three hundred different ways each day, while only saying “yes” about three times.

School and church reinforce this pattern. Our friends are similarly socialized, so they also reinforce this pattern. By the time a child is seven years old, they have completely internalized the negative reinforcement. “No,” which translates as "you can't do that," automatically comes up any time their mind thinks in positive directions.

We peel away layers of societal conditioning by training our minds to say “yes” to all the difficulties that come up. Saying “YES” to your difficulties is like leaning into your ski boots. It’s the only way to take the hill.

Excerpted from Body Intelligence, A New Paradigm by John L. Mayfield, D.C.
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