User Manual

Third Habit—Feel Your Feelings

Most of us go through life ignoring our feelings, treating them like weeds along the highway, thinking that our thoughts are so almighty important. Truth is, what we feel is infinitely more important than what our brain thinks.

As we learn to feel all our feelings, we become a more evolved soul. Because the energy of feelings and the energy of our spirit are the most similar, our spirit communicates directly with us through our feelings.

Spiritual Energy

The energy of our spirit is most like the energy of our feelings. Within our seven-dimensional bodymind, spiritual energy is nothing like the energy of our thoughts, actions, attitudes, values, principles or beliefs. Our feelings are actually a spiritual guidance system, connecting us directly with the wisdom of our spirit.

To our spirit everything is occurring here and now. Our spirit is not confined by time or space. Our physical body is, but not our spirit or soul. When we meet someone new, our spirit is instantly taking in the full measure of that woman or man. The feelings and impressions we get in those first moments are our spirit’s exact preview of how we will feel about them if we have future dealings with that person in the future. Our first impressions give us priceless information.

If someone invites you to a function that’s occurring three weeks from now, the instant they start talking about it, your spirit starts experiencing it as if it were happening here and now. To your spirit, it is. The feelings and impressions you get in those first moments are your spirit’s exact preview of how you will feel if you actually go to that event three weeks from now.

Our spirit and our soul are eternal. To them, everything is happening here and now. Our physical body is an incredible mammal that we get to live in for this lifetime, but it lives, minute-to-minute within the polarities of time and space. Time, as we know it, is only relevant to our physical body.

When we think about doing something in any future moment, our spirit is experiencing it as if we were actually there. The first feelings we have are our spirit’s exact previews of how we will feel if we actually do what we were thinking about doing.

Before anything bad ever happened to us, we got a bad feeling about it. Before any good thing happened, we got a good feeling about it. Those first feelings are our how spirit directly communicates with us.

Spiritual awareness is simply mindfulness of basic habits. The first three habits: Breathe Out Strong, Stand Tall and Feel Your Feelings form a stable foundation for our life, empowering us to meet life head-on as the hero of our story. They keep waking us up to the present moment.

Replacing unconscious habits with empowering ones is a solid pathway to higher consciousness.

Emotional Pain

When we don’t actually feel our feelings, they build up emotional pressure. The pressure, as it builds up builds up, amplifies all our aches and pains. The pressure also causes our brain to unceasingly generate thought forms, most of them fear-based. Pet scans confirm that the average person’s brain generates 70,000 thought forms every day, steadily cranking out one thought form after another like a hamster running in a squirrel cage.

Physical pain rarely exceeds a four on a one-to-ten pain scale. The more intense aching pain we experience comes from emotional pressure that builds up from feelings that we did not actually go inside and feel. As the emotional pressure builds up, it intensifies and amplifies any pain or dysfunction we have. The deep ache from the build-up of emotional pressure is more painful than purely physical pain.

When deep aching pain builds to a seven or eight, we can safely bet that seventy to eighty percent of that pain is emotional. The emotional pressure causes our brain to generate thousands of toxic thoughts and actions that we would never actually script if we fully comprehended that we write, direct and hopefully star in the screenplay of our life.

Worse, all those thoughts forms keep us trapped in the past, the future or some past/future construct where we lack the leverage to create our life the way we want it. The brain’s version of the past drags heavy chains of shame, guilt and missed opportunities to every consideration. Its version of the future projects worries, fear, anger and irritations into all its projections.

When the brain is in charge, we constantly focus on victims, us or other people. Our brain gets trapped in thousands of polarizations, like Republican vs Democrat. But mainly, the brain is a problem solver. If there are no problems, it dredges up old forgotten problems for us to get tight about. The brain is not now nor has ever been capable of creating our world in a loving manner.

Our brain was never intended to be in charge of our consciousness. That is our heart’s function. Feeling our feelings releases all the pressure in our bodymind. Our mind quietens and calms. Long minutes go by without a single thought. Peace of mind naturally fills that space.

Set a Goal and Fears Immediately Come Up

As soon as we commit to a goal, fears always come up. Always! The process of feeling our fears dissolves them into nothingness.

If we don’t stop and actually feel the feelings, our thoughts about them continue to escalate and that builds up emotional pressure. This creates a vicious cycle. As the pressure builds, our brain generates increasingly fearful thoughts. Thinking about our fears builds them up to such intensity that they can seem like sixty-feet tall fire-breathing dragons. Unfelt fears are the monsters of our old mythologies.

Under the brain's onslaught of negative thoughts and stories, the courage of our heart wilts. Our earlier bravado gets nudged aside by the onslaught of fearful thoughts. Fear becomes our advisor. Our heroic journey starts to fall apart and seem like a bad idea, and yet another noble dream or plan gets derailed.

Anytime we commit to a bold action, but don’t actually experience the fears that always come up, the fears usually win out. That’s why it’s so important to feel all the negative feelings that invariably come up. Ignoring a pervasive fear is like turning our back on a junkyard dog. The unresolved fears will come up and bite us in the backside.

The Dance that We Do

Life is so much better when we actually feel negative feelings we have about others or ourselves. As soon as we feel the feelings, the brain calms. It quits generating fear-based thoughts. Negative attachments that would keep us attached to dysfunctional people also dissolve.

After we feel the negative feelings about them, our heart naturally loves them for who they are. Magically, our thoughts about them also change.

Without exception, everyone is telepathic. Although most people are still trying to remain unconscious at this time, on the level of our spirit, everyone hears our more potent thoughts. They unconsciously react as if they heard what we were thinking and respond with reciprocal thoughts and actions.

If we cherish someone, they tend to cherish us back. If we think an angry thought toward them, they respond with either an angry, resentful or self-depreciating thoughts and actions. This is the dance we all do dozens of times a day.

Thinking or talking negatively about someone influences them to act the way we expected. Ethically, we need to assume responsibility for how we think and talk about others, not just when they are present.

Remember, it’s all energy—actually consciousness—a dance we are having with others. There are no “one-way thoughts.” We are always existing in relationship with others and all of life. Part of being impeccable is assuming that everyone and everything responds to our thoughts, as if they are physically hearing us. On the level of their spirit, they are.

Excerpted from Body Intelligence, A New Paradigm by John L. Mayfield, D.C.

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